Why We Need a Radical New Language of Peace

Words cannot be used as weapons of war

Photo by George Pagan III on Unsplash

For months now, I have debated with myself regarding if and how to write about the current Israel/Palestine situation and the explosion of hate and anger in our countries. For the most part, though I have strong feelings, I have chosen to stay out of the highly charged, political debate.

But I’ll be honest: this has been a very hard seven months. I am deeply and personally pained by the immense suffering of the people of Gaza and the West Bank, the fear, grief, and trauma of the Israeli people and Jews everywhere, the horrors the hostages and their families are enduring, and the way this war has created even more pain and conflict around the world.

I have watched horrified as innocent people on both sides have suffered needlessly, and I have listened with shame as leaders and extremists on both sides use interpretations of religion and history as a weapon, seemingly unconcerned about the implications of their words or their actions. I have observed fearfully as the world takes sides in righteousness leading to cancel culture, protest, and police action. I have also watched in alarm and despair as the conflict spilled into our own streets, homes, institutions and online, with increasing anti-Semitism, Islamophobia, and violence, causing deeper division and fear.

Even more distressingly, I've listened as words have been distorted to mean things that they never meant or intended to mean. Words like Zionism, Resistance, Intifada, Victory, Liberation, and Justice are weaponized and hurled to vilify or exonerate one side or another, and to justify actions that only perpetuate the very things they claim to want to end.

This new lexicon has nothing to do with waging peace: it is the language of more war, or what scholar Ruth Wisse calls, “The politics of the pointing finger.” It blames, separates, dehumanizes, and destroys. It lacks any nuance or empathy, creating a zero-sum game, where one side is right and the other wrong and must be eliminated. If we use or misuse words as weapons of destruction, hate, division, dismantling, and violence, we cannot ever create a fairer, more equitable, just, or peaceful world.

Last night, I watched a very moving joint Israeli Palestinian Memorial Day Ceremony held by the Combatants for Peace, an organization of former soldiers and militants on both sides of this conflict, and The Parents’ Circle Families Forum, a group of parents on both sides who have lost children to war. For more than an hour, Palestinians and Israelis gathered and held space for one another’s grief, sharing their stories, and begging their leaders to work for peace, not extremism, fanaticism or more war.  I invite you (no, I urge you) to watch here.

The words I heard from former soldiers, militants, parents, children, and families of those who have died in these conflicts were words from the heart, not ideological slogans. They were personal, not political. They were words born from deep grief and deep love, from genuine faith, hope for the future, and respect for the sanctity of life – all lives.

But most importantly, they were offered in the spirit of finding common ground, not creating greater division. In contrast to our public protests and debates, they were calls for real peace, not just a re-framing or justification for more war. Though I doubt the leaders and extremists bothered to watch, if they did, and allowed themselves to truly hear and feel what was being said, we might be on a path towards peace.

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In 1670, Jewish philosopher, Baruch Spinoza, wrote: “Peace is not an absence of war, it is a virtue, a state of mind, a disposition for benevolence, confidence, justice.”

This is the key: peace is a disposition for benevolence, confidence, and justice. According to the etymological roots, benevolence means “goodwill,” confidence means “trust” and justice means “sincere, moral, ordered.” Peace, then, is a disposition towards trust, sincerity, morality, and goodwill…and the actions that follow from those intentions.

That disposition is what is lacking in the extreme positions not just of the leaders or fundamentalists of Israel, Palestine, and other countries, but on our college campuses and in social media. Instead, our disposition is one of righteousness, outrage, distrust, and, in some cases, ill will that calls for the dismantlement and eradication of a people, a country, or a religion. From mindset comes language, and from the language comes action. From a disposition for war and a weaponized language of “anti-” can only come more war.

Though there are extremist factions on both sides hellbent on destruction, the vast majority of the people of Israel and Palestine want to raise their children in safety, prosperity and security, with an end to the cycle of violence that takes the lives of so many. And while there are many people around the world who also use the language and actions of war to justify positions that dehumanize others, I suspect that many of us don’t want to fight with one another over history or rhetoric, online, in the streets, on campus or in our own homes. We want peace with each other, too.

We can only walk toward peace by turning away from a disposition for war to one of mutual benevolence, trust, and sincerity, by listening to one another, not shouting at one another, or worse. Peace — true peace — can only come from hearing from our hearts, not our minds, and allowing our hearts to break for each other, regardless of which ideological, political or religious side you are on.

But, to do that, we must change our language. Instead of using the language of war (or using language as war), we desperately need a radical new language that fosters goodwill, trust, sincerity. We need a language that doesn’t dehumanize but re-humanizes. We need a language that is pro-peace, not anti-war (or anti-anything).

I don’t know what those words should be, but I know they aren’t the asinine, ambiguous aphorisms of Love and Light or ideologically-based slogans. We need language that is actual and actionable, that emphasizes respect, collaboration, cooperation, co-existence, community, care, generosity, hospitality, harmony, forgiveness, empathy. We need words for peace, not against each other.

When we have and use a vocabulary that emphasizes these things, we will be more likely to find solutions to conflicts that war and destruction will never solve. Through an actual language of peace, we can build a future in which all children can live in safety and security, in which everyone is heard, respected, and offered a chance to thrive.

May we find the words of peace and use them with compassion and care.

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Below, I offer a prayer written by two female spiritual leaders, one Palestinian, one Israeli.

Prayer of Mothers for Life and Peace תפילה למעמד המשותף
أغنية الحياة والسلام

Written by Sheikha Ibtisam Mahameed and Rabbi Tama Elad-Applebaum1

English Translation by Rabbi Amichai Lau-Lavie

God of Life
Who heals the broken hearted and binds up their wounds
May it be your will to hear the prayer of mothers
For you did not create us to kill each other
Nor to live in fear, anger or hatred in your world
But rather you have created us so we can grant permission to one another to sanctify Your name of Life, your name of Peace in this world.

For these things I weep, my eye, my eye runs down with water
For our children crying at nights,
For parents holding their children with despair and darkness in their hearts.

For a gate that is closing, and who will open it before the day has ended?2

And with my tears and prayers which I pray
And with the tears of all women who deeply feel the pain of these difficult days I raise my hands to you please God have mercy on us.
Hear our voice that we shall not despair
That we shall see life in each other,
That we shall have mercy for each other,
That we shall have pity on each other,
That we shall hope for each other

And we shall write our lives in the book of Life For your sake God of Life
Let us choose Life.

For you are Peace, your world is Peace and all that is yours is Peace, and so shall be your will and let us say Amen.

1 https://opensiddur.org/?p=9158; This work is licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. To view a copy of this license, visit http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0/

2 Translation of this line by Rabbi Dalia Marx. (Thanks to Rabbi Debora Sophie Gordon for informing us of this translation and that the reference is to a phrase from the seliḥot at the beginning of the Yom Kippur neïlah service.) Rabbi Amichai Lau-Lavie has “For a gate that is closing and who will open it while day has not yet dawned.”